The Haiti In My Backyard

Yes- It has been a long time since I posted last; and for all 10 of my viewers... I have missed you!
My husband and I have been doing a LOT of re-evaluating recently for several reasons. And I sit here listening to one of my favorite artist, Marc Broussard (you should check him out), I feel the need to explain where all of our decisions have led us...

My commitment to the Commonwealth of Ky will be up this Friday....YAY, YAY, YAY...It has been 2 LONG years. I have put in applications for other jobs here and there- ya know positions that I am mostly under-qualified for and that are based in Haiti or South Africa (don't tell Jonathan). But nothing that I was seriously considering. Jonathan is currently working on his undergrad (he wants to pursue architecture) and he is only working part part-time drumming. Yes I meant to add the 2nd 'part.' Therefore, I don't really have another option other than continuing to work in Child Protection Services until either he graduates and gets a job OR I find another social work job with good pay/benefits... Haha...like that'll happen :)

In the meantime...

Our apartment's lease just ran out. That's right, 1 year of marriage down, hopefully 80 more to come (well, maybe like 65). We were looking at other apartments or houses for rent in Lexington...somewhere in between my work in Jessamine County and downtown (where school and our church are located). Nothing we saw really competed with the $400 per month townhouse we were offered in downtown Nicholasville...Unfortunately. Now I grew up in Nich-Vegas (West-Side Colt Pride, baby) and I'm used to all the jokes of rednecks and hillbillies in the sticks of Jess. County (I mean we are like 2 seconds from Lexington, but whatever). But for some reason I HATED the thought of moving back to my hometown, especially in the heart (and kinda the ghetto) of the city. It's true we will be moving to a nice townhouse but it's kinda...well...uh....near my clients.

So- Here's my Revelation and the point of this post:
I realized that Jonathan and I have been given such an incredible opportunity to love and minister (spiritually and physically) to a group of people that have become near and dear to my heart. Sure sometimes I get frustrated with the people who get high everyday and raise their kids on food stamps, K-TAP, Section 8, and Medicaid...but I also have gained an appreciation for those hard-working moms and dads who work daily to break cycles of abuse, addiction, poverty and laziness. Here's my opportunity to not live "above" the people I try to help everyday, but to become a neighbor- to be a part of the community I want so desperately to impact.

As my brother helped me understand- instead of complaining because of the ugliness I see when I look out of my new bedroom window; I now want to create beauty. I want to plant a garden or clean our park, or play with the single mom's kid who lives next door to us.

Some of the world's most brilliant leaders and humanitarians believe that in order to change or eradicate a global crisis such as AIDS, Human Trafficking, Poverty, Lack of Clean Water, etc...The change must come from within the population most affected. I'm working towards those big issues, but for now- I will do what I can with what I have until God leads us somewhere else!

I Wouldn't Touch Your Kid With a 15-Foot Pole

Dirty House Referrals are the WORST.

Occasionally I receive an investigation on a family due to the poor living conditions of their home. This typically means one of the following: Excessive clutter (imagine Hoarders: Buried Alive), Reoccurring Bedbugs and/or head lice found in the home or on the children, or the home was found to be in "deplorable conditions" which typically is associated with a combination of piles of dirty clothes, dirty dishes, trash laying everywhere, animal feces in the home, etc. Oh and sometimes a investigation is taken due to a child coming to school daily with a terrible odor, dirty clothes or lice-infested hair.

You get the idea

Now, the response of most is something like "That is so pathetic" or "How hard is to keep your house clean" or maybe even "You don't have to have money to keep your kids clean."
And part of me agrees completely. I mean, come on, I don't want to have to walk through a stranger's house taking pictures of dog poop and bugs climbing on the walls and have to tell a perfectly capable adult..."Hey please clean up this crap so your kid can have a normal childhood and not get bullied at school for smelling like B.O." It's frustrating and kinda sad to say the least.

But then there are other times when I think about the standard we (Americans) have for our children... I start to think about millions of children around the world who sleep on dirt floors and will never have air conditioning and have to go to the bathroom by squatting over a hole in the ground. I hate to ruin your concept of "poor African orphans" but those kids probably smell terrible. However, those conditions are acceptable for those kids, right? That is all they know; no one is walking through their home asking their parents to clean up. Why? Because that is the culture of so many people around the world. It's not sad...it's not abuse...it is a unique part of their culture that no one even thinks twice about because, again, that is all they know.

Why are the same conditions appreciated as a part of one child's unique culture but to another, they are unacceptable, disgusting and negligent??? Let me guess...It is because we are in America...we know better...we have different standards. Am i right? When I start thinking in this mindset, it gets me in trouble because I lose focus on what policy tells me is and is not acceptable for American children. I'm not sure if I feel worse for "our" children or "their" children to be honest. So why the disparity? This is the kind of stuff that keeps me up at night.

Just a thought. I suppose I will just follow the rules...(For Now)!!!

An Old-Fashioned Conundrum

A co-worker of mine recently relocated to a different state. Now, as you can understand, the turnover rate for social workers in this job is high. People quit often; it's just something we have come to normalize. And while this occurs frequently, it makes the workload of those brave (or dumb, however you look at it) workers who stay increase.

So back to my friend who left the office a few weeks ago...her cases were divided between the rest of us. And lucky me, I get possibly the most complicated case I have ever worked. Here's the story:

Teenage female who is very low-functioning and who has a plethora of mental health diagnoses is committed to the Commonwealth of KY (ward of the state). She was involuntarily re-committed when she turned 18 because she simply cannot function independently...I mean, seriously- suicidal, aggressive, sexually-active, resistant to authority...and now- homicidal. NOT a good combo is you ask me.

Right before her previous case worker left she had a "placement disruption" and had to be moved again; she has had no fewer than 10 different placements in just the past couple of years. Well, as my luck would have it, the first week of being case manager of this little fire-ball, she tries setting her foster home on fire. No lie. Luckily, only the wreath on the front door and the bushes actually catch fire, but nonetheless- it's a close call.

For obvious reasons the foster family puts in their 2 week notice (after she threatens to follow through and set the family's son on fire when everyone is asleep). She was admitted to a "hospital" where they will only keep her 3-6 days. This chick has literally been in every placement this side of the Mississippi. We have NO where to place her (Oh and to top it off, this family has other younger children still living at home who are probably getting ready to be removed due to similar behavioral problems and the fact that their bio mom may die at any moment).

In this situation, I have to ask: What good are we doing? In no way are we helping this family. I would even claim that there is no way we could help this family due to the severity of their mental health issues. It is moments like these in which I feel defeated. I really have no solution.

I am in a pickle. NOT very excited about Monday morning.

(I will now re-read my 'Grateful' post for some encouragement)

Blessings,

KMaup

Grateful (part 1)

Thanks to some inspiration from my favorite neighborhood hippie, Stephanie LeBlanc, I am posting my first of (hopefully) many posts regarding all of the things...no matter how small...I am thankful for.

And guess what- It's not even Thanksgiving. Yes, it's true, I am grateful for so much no matter what time of year....so I will share 

- Employment: Seriously, I have an office to go to everyday. I know I am getting a paycheck on the 15th and 30th. I have job security (I don't even think I could get fired if I tried...I could throw a book at my supervisor and not get fired apparently). Wow, I know a lot of people who aren't as fortunate. 

-Girl Scout Cookies: Holy crap, are you kidding me? Girl scout cookies give me a reason to wake up some mornings- I have gone especially overboard this year and purchased Shortbreads, Thin Mints, Caramel Delights (NOT Somoans- I mean, Please, let's be culturally competent here), the peanut butter ones, Lemonades- you get the point. YUMMMMMMY

- Antibiotics- It's crazy how fast those little pills work :) Western medicine = Yes, please!

- My little brother's skinny jeans: I made fun of him at first, but come on, Solomon (age 7) won't wear anything else to school and I think it is now the cutest thing in the world. Love him and his little pants!!!

- Postsecret.com: My friend, Sophia, got me hooked on this website...and honestly, it makes my life feel so calm and normal. It gives me something to do other than work every Monday morning.

- The hispanic construction workers I hear outside my door right now: It sounds like a joke, but I am so thankful for those hard-working dudes who build buildings like in the blink of an eye. And well, I really want to learn Spanish so they're pretty cool for speaking Spanish.

*And I invite all of you to count your Blessings 1x1...go ahead, make a list. It will make you think twice before you complain.

***Stay tuned for future 'Grateful' posts.

Blessings,

KMaup

Despair vs. Disparity

I am ashamed.
When I initially work with a family, suspicion is the norm. I don't trust them, I don't feel safe in their home, I don't believe that what they are telling me is the truth.
Ashamed...but it's how the world has taught me to be.

Until yesterday, I thought my uneasiness was my "wise as a serpent" intellect at work. Instead, what I learned was my doubt was really my prejudice.
Very Ashamed.

Yesterday I received an investigation (4:00pm on a Friday= not a happy social worker) that took me to a part of central Ky I had not ventured. As I was following my G.P.S...that my husband and I have named Gus...through the streets of the upper-middle class suburbs, I was surprised. Lets just say that my typical clientele do not normally worry about clutter in their two-car garages, forgetting to put out their Rosies or paying their neighborhood dues. So when I pull in front of a beautiful two-story, stone, home- I let my guard down; the same guard I have been trained to ALWAYS have up.

Long story (sort of) short, this cute little wealthy family that I had come to interview- immediately made me feel comfortable just because I knew they had money and could maintain a nice and clean home. The entire 90 minutes I was in the home, I wasn't searching for drug paraphernalia or  making sure there wasn't pedophile living in their basement. I judged them for having iphones; I assumed they could not put me in harms way because their children were wearing American Eagle jeans and hoodies. I automatically trusted that their testimonies were the absolute truth.
Majorly Ashamed and Unwise.

Luckily, I actually was safe and nothing dangerous happened. However, I realized that I should continue to be cautious of my surroundings wherever my job takes me...not just in the trailer parks or ghettos of Jessamine County.

'Ya Can't be Good at Everything

No- this picture* isn't just so I can show off my incredible niece, even though she is… the picture proves the point of today’s blog:

I Am A Terrible Photographer!!!

(I mean, look at it- she's really a cute kid in real life but you couldn't tell, right?)

What do my poor artistic skills have to do with social work, you ask? Oh I’m so glad you asked…I take photos on a regular basis as an investigator. One example: taking a picture of an injury to a child (bruise, cut, sore, rash, burn, etc.); Another example: taking pictures of evidence in a home (drugs, excessive dirt/clutter, other dangerous items that could pose a threat to a child). You get the idea.

So as you- my loyal readers- can image…these photos can be particularly important to prove whether or not abuse/neglect occurred. So what’s a girl to do? I can never get the right angle, or master the correct lighting; I Definitely can’t get my subject to cooperate with the instructions- “turn to the left, be still, stand closer to the light, stop spinning around.” It also doesn’t help when everyone in my office shares one camera that’s about 12 years old that is always either missing batteries or the memory card.

The other day, I told a kid that I had to take his picture because he was “just so handsome.” Because he didn’t know I really wanted to take a picture of the hand prints around his neck, all I could do was stand back and try to ZOOM in as much as possible. Poor guy, he was just smiling so big thinking I was actually taking a picture of his face. The end result = a blurry pic of what looks like a hickey on a 3 year old kid.

FAIL

Moral of the Blog: I am now accepting photography lessons.  

*Photo of: Novalee Grace Smith; Photographed by: KMaup

Kat's Gotta Blog...?...

Yeah... so, Hey Guys!
News Update: I'm starting a blog.
Reason: Well... I'm a Child Protective Worker and I think my job is interesting to say the least, and I want to document some thoughts, stories, struggles, lessons learned, etc. And what's a better way to do this than start blogging.

Honestly, this blog will be more of a way for me to cope and process some of the difficult day-to-day crap I'm dealing with, so hang in there- don't give up on me early on. If I get some good feedback, maybe one day I'll turn my stories into an Academy Award Winning movie- we'll see.

I'm just a BASW (Bachelor of Arts in Social Work) who's trying to make a difference, one cracked-out child abuser at a time.

So in the words of the Joker...."Here, We, Go!"

Blessings
- KMaup (formally Smith)